Stephanie Miller: My Mother's Bird Is Aroused By Fox News Channel

BIRD-BRAINED RADIO

Is This Libtalk's Most Pathetic Moment?




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We've covered many dubious liberal talk radio moments over the years, but this bizarre rant may top them all: one host's claim that her mother's bird is aroused by the Fox News Channel!

Syndicated libtalker Stephanie Miller dropped this on her listeners during yesterday's program. Listen (if you dare) as she uses her own mother and the latter's pet bird to disparage Fox News:

STEPHANIE MILLER: Chris! I then went to Charlotte North Carolina where as you know my 88-year-old Republican mother and my Republican brother, who hung me, when I was a child, live. And I think it’s important to mention as this point that my Mom’s bird masturbates to Fox News. (plays Fox breaking news sounder)

LAVOIE: um um.

MILLER: Now, in all fairness, I have been warned about this cause if anything can be compared to your 88-year-old Republican mother who raised you Catholic explaining to you how her bird masturbates I don’t know what’s more disturbing. In my personal opinion, she sort of did what he does with his arms, except she had trouble with the word. She’s like, oh Stephy, what’s the word, masturbate. I was like oh I know wow [Lavoie interrupts]

LAVOIE: Yeah Republicans (Miller interrupts)

MILLER: This is going to be years of therapy now. And as I previously said my mom at her age if she were any close to Glenn Beck she would be poltergeist. She would be in the TV spooning with Glenn Beck.

So, ah the Fox News on all the time and the bird, love bird it’s a love bird named Pretty Boy and cause you know what many people have asked me how does a bird masturbate? Cause you know, no hands, no opposable thumbs. Well let me explain, he has a colorful chain a colorful sort of rubber you know, they have a lot of sort of colorful bird toys in there. And so he has a chain that he sits on, it’s like a rubber chain. It’s a perch you know it like a (Lavoie interrupts)

LAVOIE: A perch yeah, that’s a chain.

MILLER: Oh it’s also a chain that he regurgitates his food on and then eats it again. By the way the cage right next to the dinner table. So that’s already ah huh. And so anyway, what happens is he sort of get going on the chain he kind of just sort of here I’m doing it if you’re watching U-stream you see he kind of does this he rocks into the thing with his he pushes his little beep into the chain. It’s not a chain it’s a rubber thing whatever anyway he starts he just starts and then he does this thing, now you’ll have to be on U-stream to see. He raises his little what are they wings above his and goes huba-hy-ya and just kind of lays on the chain exhausted to ah Fox News. [applause sound effect]

Just in case anyone had missed this sorry exchange, Miller brought it up again later in the program.

Miller's mother is the widow of William E Miller, 1964 GOP Vice-Presidential nominee and onetime Republican National Committee chairman.

Something tells me we'll ALL need years of therapy after this one.